About a year and a half ago I logged on to Zoom for the first time. It was fun to catch voyeuristic glimpses of friends and colleagues’ home/work lives. Most of them seemed more at ease with it than I. They could change backgrounds, share their screen, have custom profile pics, and invite new guests into the conversation. Eventually, I would catch up and have a less passive engagement with Zoom. After a couple of sessions, I could focus on the actual conversation and not have that nagging feeling that something could be going wrong. I’m not a Luddite, but it doesn’t mean that I trust technology to not harm. This viewpoint doesn’t dictate my actions, but it is the lens through which my world is informed. That said, I do enjoy my zoom calls with my friends and colleagues. They are those who I choose to stay in communication with, sharing our lives. However, after some time I notice behavioral oddities, like walking away without explanation. Was there an emergency, I wondered. Are they having another conversation with hand signals? Were they not available and now have to pretend they are not on a Zoom call? I could go on, but you get the point. Nobody else on the call mentions it, am I the odd one for noticing?
As a guest speaker, I feel a bit more nervous and that is mostly because of my fear that the connection may fail. Again, I don’t trust the technology to work to carry the transmitting, and having to repeat myself throwing me off message. Also, during these calls, I feel that the stakes are a bit higher as they are generally time limited. Once they are in progress I am searching for facial reactions to whatever it is I’m saying. Without fail, there will be individuals who are in front of the camera but they are not present and almost look uncomfortable. I will wonder, who hurt you, dude? Are my words making your ears bleed? Why are you here? Obviously, these are rhetorical questions. But, honestly, they are adults and yet behave as children who hate to sit still.
Now, I’ve zoomed with family and that is usually a train-wreck. If it were a TV show it would most certainly be the lowest-rated satirical drama. Not everyone is ready after they all agreed to be available. Not everyone is sober or coherent. Suddenly someone wants to include a family member who has never owned or operated a computer. Now they need to receive a crash course on downloading the app and use of the said app. Family members will abandon the call and random people will walk by and say hello. Phones will be placed on a counter or table facing up displaying their ceiling fixtures. I guess when you are family all pretenses are off the table.
As Christmas approaches and Covid hangs around, there will surely be many more Zoom calls. Well, this will probably go into the summer after most people are vaccinated. In the meantime, I do recommend the following guidelines for your consideration.
ADULT ZOOM GUIDELINES
- Mute your microphone if you are not talking and have background noise going on.
- Excuse yourself if you need to step away. Seriously.
- Be mindful of background noise. See no. 1
- Stay sober through the duration of call.
- Position your camera properly.
- Stay engaged with the conversation.
- Limit distractions.
- Avoid multi-tasking.
- Prepare materials in advance.